Guilty or Not?

Have you ever compared your success to that of your friends, neighbors, or acquaintances? I assume most of us have done this; I know I have. Of course, you want them to be successful in every way. But obtaining a valid discernment from surface only, gives you no facts. Everyone has a story.

fruit

If you compare yourself to your perception of others, then the possibility of your self-esteem deflating is great. The negative assumptions you allow to roll around in your mind can be harmful to your mental well-being. Even though the outward appearance seems perfect, it’s exactly that. ‘Seems’ may be the key word because that individual could be struggling inwardly.

Is there one method of how you measure success? Essentially, it’s up to interpretation. What does success mean to you? Think about what you want in life. What kind of person do you aspire to be? In my opinion, here’s what you shouldn’t do – don’t give dollar signs too much power in measuring success. They can be misleading. Other factors display victory, such as volunteering, honest work ethic, being a loving parent, sister, daughter, son, friend, etc. The list is endless.

measure-success

Think carefully how you measure success because the last thing you need is to fall into a depressed mind-set caused by comparing yourself to others. Letting those unfavorable thoughts take control of your mind will only create clutter and make things messy in your life. So, here’s a must-do…focus on what makes you feel successful. Everyone has demons. It’s in our DNA to judge. That doesn’t mean it’s healthy. You and I both know it’s not, so try not to do it. It’s as simple as that. Focus on you, not on how others seem on the outside.

Do you have any thoughts on this subject? Any experiences? For example, I’ll start by saying that since I didn’t go to college, I’ve compared myself to those who have. As a result, at times, my mood shifted into puddles of negativity. As some of you may remember, I did a post years ago about returning to school. I was excited and had taken all the English courses (which I loved) needed for an Associates Degree. Then I began thinking, “Why am I doing this?” I truly thought deeply about what going back to school would entail. Sure, the diploma would look great hanging on the wall next to my husband’s and children’s. However, I came to the realization that a college degree doesn’t define who I am. I’m Me with or without it. So, I didn’t quit; I just chose not to continue, but I gained a lot from those English classes I took. This entire paragraph’s subject may sound silly to you, but was anything but silly to me – divulging this is me being vulnerable, too. Moving forward, I no longer think those college-educated people are better than me. What they accomplished is commendable, and it’s as simple as that.

The easy road spirals downward; the challenging road stimulates your mind and nudges you to look deeply within yourself.

be you

Lauren ❤
All photos courtesy of Google.

Wishes, New Days, & Popcorn!

dandelion arctic

Visualize it: Close your eyes. Get in the zone, and focus solely on your wish – Nothing else!  Another idea is to make a Vision Board. Have you heard of these? Cut out photos from magazines that represent your wish. Or, if you’re super creative and skilled, you could draw, draw, draw! 

Believe it: Don’t let the face of doubt stare you down into a puddle of self-pity.
Don’t let the hand of
negativity hold you down in the sinkhole of “I can’ts.”

Do it: Take action! If you think by sitting on your sofa – remote in one hand, popcorn in the other – is going to make your wish a reality…think again! 

Image result for making wishes come true

“Do the thing and you will have the power.”
~Ralph Waldo Emerson

(It’s as simple as that.) 

 

New Day, New Dreams

Today’s a new day
for that baby step
Don’t even look back
just take a deep breath

 Don’t listen to words
that may keep you still
Optimism is your friend
along with your will

 Keep your dreams in view
not allowing them to stray
With fear on the sidelines
You Can Be Brave

 Instead of your heart
wear strength on your sleeve
Stay focused with soul
and in Yourself, Believe!

So, did you make a wish?
If so, what are you going to do about it?

 

Lauren Scott © 2018
Photos: LScott/SabrinaFair
Image: I wish – Google
Poem from my book,
New Day, New Dreams

Be My Guest

thank you in the sandDear Family and Friends,

Today’s post is primarily to thank you all for your support and encouragement throughout the years. I believe 2018 will mark my 7th year of blogging. Many of you have been with me since day one, so your endless support and friendship is invaluable to me. To those of you who are new to Baydreamer, I appreciate your interest and time taken to visit, as well, and hope you’ll find something special to draw you back now and then. 

With this being said, I invite All of You to visit my Guestbook (see Guestbook tab). If you have the time, I’d love to hear from you, also. Even if you’ve visited before, “liked” or written me a note, now is as good as time as any to write again. Years have passed, bloggers and blogs have endured changes over time. So, you might have something new to say. 

Anyway, Thanks Again, and I’m ending with some beautiful wisdom…

best things

Love, Lauren ❤❤❤

(Photos courtesy of Google)

Your Reflection

mirror

When you look in the mirror, what do you see? Do you smile or do you turn your back on yourself? Do you sometimes wish your house was mirror-less?

How did your year end? Did you love yourself last year?

How is your new year beginning? Do you love yourself now?

“Wanting to be someone else is a waste of the person you are.” Kurt Cobain

We’ve all heard the saying, “You have to love yourself before you can love others.”

It’s so easy to find faults with ourselves, whether they’re physical or results of something we said or did. Or maybe we’re just not smart enough. The list is ongoing. Most people doubt themselves at some time in their lives. Self-worth and self-esteem waver every so often. After all, we’re only human. We occasionally make choices that create an outcome making us wish we chose a different door.

“We torture ourselves incessantly, and for what purpose? Wouldn’t life be so much more fun, productive, and sexy if we fully embraced our magnificently delightful selves?” Jen Sincero 

Love yourself

Regarding physical appearance, we have screens of all sizes telling us how to be good-looking (for both women and men) and how to defy age. We learn that, instead of embracing laugh lines and those wonderful memories that caused them, they should be covered because looking young “forever” is what matters most. I suppose I’ll be an anomaly then because Botox or anything that requires a needle on the face is not an option for me. Of course, I’ve noticed changes that I’m not thrilled about, but it’s all a part of growing older, and between you and me, it’s the better alternative. I’ve had dear friends who were never given the chance to grow old. 

men ageing

“There will never be anyone exactly like you. You were given special gifts and talents to share with the world, and even though everybody has special gifts and talents, nobody will use theirs quite the same way you do…You are the only you that will ever be. You are kind of a big deal.” Jen Sincero

So, if you’re struggling with yourself, choose to Forgive yourself. Don’t be so quick to beat yourself up. Accept who You are and Love Yourself. If you do all these things, then your outlook on the world and people around you will be so much brighter. You’ll be able to allow others into your circle and give them the authentic gift of Kindness, Compassion, and Love…the authentic gift of You!

girl looking in mirror

“You’ll find that life is still worthwhile, if you just smile.” Charlie Chaplin

FORGIVE YOURSELF, LOVE YOURSELF, AND SMILE. ISN’T THIS A GREAT WAY TO START THE NEW YEAR?

~Lauren Scott
(All photos courtesy of Google)

 

One December Evening

holding hands quote and photo 2014

I don’t know what other couples do, but my husband and I make it a point to remember those smaller events that led up to the wedding day, and today is one of them…our first date 30 years ago. We were 26 & 27 at the time, and we vividly remember that evening…the amazing restaurant for dinner, then driving up the mountain to The Baldy Lodge for dancing.

If you’ve followed me for awhile, you no doubt know that I’m a big hopeless romantic, and this night was definitely a magical one. During that evening of romance, we both experienced the incredible feeling that we might be “the one” for each other. That may sound silly, but…

As it turned out, we were “the one” for each other because six months following that night, he proposed. Then six months after that proposal, we were married. And here we are…grateful to still have each other and our two beautiful children, who are now 22 & 26 years old.

our wedding

This isn’t a post to brag though. We’ve experienced loss throughout our years together. So, we don’t take anything for granted because nothing is guaranteed. Instead, we cherish each moment of every day and continue to count our blessings. 

So, I’m wishing my Husband and Best Friend a very Happy 30th-First-Date Anniversary!!

🎉🎈🎉🎈

“I thank him for making my life the best and for bringing out the best in me. I love him even more now, and I hope we have the chance to celebrate many more anniversaries as the calendar pages continue to turn.” 

summer patio time 2016

❤❤❤

 

Music for All Ages

musical-notes

While stopped at a red light yesterday, I looked in my rear-view mirror and noticed the elderly woman in the car behind me. She must have been in her eighties, and she was literally rockin’ out. I couldn’t help but watch this adorable woman sing to her heart’s content, and my lips immediately formed a smile. She began snapping her fingers, too, and her rhythm was flawless.

Then I wondered what she was listening to. Perhaps Frank Sinatra, Tommy Dorsey, Tony Bennett, or maybe even some Elvis or The Beatles? My curiosity was piqued, even though I wouldn’t have the chance to find out. The light soon turned green, and we both were on our way. However, she stayed behind me for a few more blocks, so I continued to watch her sing and wholeheartedly enjoy her tunes. As we parted ways, I silently wished her a joyful day, but clearly, she already had that taken care of.

This simple experience warmed my heart, so I wanted to share. It goes to show that music is for all ages, whether you’re listening, playing an instrument, or singing.

guitar
Also, here’s a guitar update for my daughter and I…we’re taking lessons with Josh Zee, who has been playing for over thirty years. He’s recorded 2 major label records on the SONY/Work label as the singer/guitarist and songwriter for the Rock group “Protein”. Josh’s next original band, “the Mother Truckers”, has released 4 albums, toured all over the country and Europe.
Needless to say, it’s been exciting to meet and work with him. Currently, we’re learning “Somebody Like You” by Keith Urban (for you country music lovers). We’re progressing, but it sure makes us appreciate those amazing guitar players who create the illusion that playing is absolutely easy. 🙂

And here are some model quotes for your enjoyment:

“One good thing about music, when it hits you, you feel no pain.”
― Bob Marley

“Music was my refuge. I could crawl into the space between the notes and curl my back to loneliness.” 
― Maya Angelou

“Life is for the living.
Death is for the dead.
Let life be like music. 
And death a note unsaid.” 
― Langston Hughes

“Ah, music,” he said, wiping his eyes. “A magic beyond all we do here!” 
― J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone

music and guitar

Have an awesome Friday,
and let music
join you today!

741863664-music-notes-clipart-05

 

Renewing

new yamaha guitar for Lauren Oct 2017

Recently, I’ve been inspired to renew an old passion of mine, playing the guitar. I used to play a little when I was younger – late teens, early twenties, along with my ultimate passion for singing. But then life happened, and I chose a different path, which, just so you know, I don’t regret.

Those earlier years, though, instilled the love of music in me, which then was passed onto my daughter, who also loves to sing. My husband and son don’t sing or play an instrument, but they love listening to music. This form of art has always been a big part of our family.

So, a few days ago, I spontaneously went to “just look” at guitars. Bananas at Large is the go-to place for musical instruments and lessons. Well, so much for looking because I came home with a brand new Yamaha acoustic guitar. Since many years have passed, I’m a beginner again, so it’s a great start, not to mention that it’s beautiful. Since then, my daughter and I have been doing 30-minute sessions each night, starting with the basics. My excitement immediately inspired her, so it’s also turned out to be a fun mother/daughter time. I’m also currently looking into lessons, perusing all the teachers at Bananas to find the best fit for both of us.

I am so excited that I feel like a little kid! Seriously! My singing voice has changed, but maybe I can even get it back into gear as I learn the guitar. Now of course, the worst part is conditioning the fingers. Some of those chords, OUCH!

Thus, do any of you play guitar? Do you have stories to tell of when you first learned and your fingers were screaming at you? Any wise words of wisdom or gentle advice? Have any of you renewed an old passion, lately?

Here’s to Renewing Old Passions, and knowing that You’re Never Too Old!

Lauren Scott 2017

(p.s. wish me luck!)

 

The Simplest of Treasures

my parents' black silverware

It’s not uncommon to find sentimental possessions after parents move on to their eternal life. When my husband and I camped earlier this month, and while preparing for our first dinner, I found the box of silverware that we always use. This set came from my parents, who used it at our cabin in Big Bear, CA back in the sixties and seventies. How funny that I can vividly remember using it in our rustic mountain get-away, even though I was very young. It’s amazing how some memories stay in our minds over the years.

Anyway, after arriving home, then in the midst of doing camping clean-up, it dawned on me that I didn’t want this set stashed away in the camping tub anymore – not to be seen or used until the next trip, which currently is unplanned. This set of black silverware suddenly held an abundance of sentimentality and tugged at my heart. I even broke down during that first night of camping after coming across this treasure, crying hard for several minutes. Oh, how my heart was hurting…Yes, I’m still grieving, but I’m also appreciating those vivid, loving memories.

Then I thought even deeper and had a good talk with my husband about how sturdy this set is to have lasted through about five decades! No, it’s not fancy, and black doesn’t match the interior of our home; however, it is neutral, versatile, and durable (as we now know). So, as much as I love to coordinate decorations, themes, and colors, I’m bending my own rules because this black silverware has become a vital component in our kitchen. Whenever we use it for breakfast, lunch, and dinner, we think of my parents, Mom’s excellent cooking, the conversations that flowed around the table, and family love and contentment that followed those delicious meals. It just goes to show that the simplest of treasures can hold the most significance.

Do you have a similar story to share about a simple treasure that means a lot to you? If so, I’d love to read it…

Lauren Scott 9.28.17