In the beginning…
She never believed in love at first sight
Until he entered her lonesome world
So blissfully in love with her good-looking guy
She was the luckiest girl around
She saw only perfection in his brawny demeanor
His dashing smile enlightened her soul
He was charming and wonderfully masculine
She was completely head over heels
Then dark clouds loomed, her world was tilting
She often blamed herself; her love wasn’t enough
His character transformed in a wicked way
Crushing and bruising her spirit
He took advantage of the simplest things
He had to prove the power was his
She showed no feeling when the pain began
Means to escaping consumed her mind
She forgave at first, assuming his behavior had lapsed
Never thinking it would return again
She was raised to absolve and so she did
Not knowing his love would turn evil
In the present…
She completes the dinner prepared for him
And concludes with a silent prayer
Remaining calm, though unsure of his mood
Her emotions won’t freeze by fear
He walks through the door like a gentleman
And greets her with his meaningless kiss
She serves him his meal on their china
“How was your day?” he, carelessly, asks
She laughs at his absurdity,
But not for him to hear
She mustn’t provoke an angry attack
She must train her reactions to be still
With his stinging words and brutal hands
He’s pounded her into the hardened ground
Maybe weakness clouded her vision
Not allowing the truth to be seen
But, as sure as she was taught to absolve
She had a choice to be smart and proactive
Thus, for self respect, she’ll seek the light
So she can watch the sun rise on the other side
Copyright 2011
Baydreamer ~ Lauren Scott 
Thank you for this.
You’re welcome~
This is stunningly intimate and frank. I feel the emotions seeping through every line. I can feel the heartbeat of two people struggling on different sides of a relationship and it strikes at my core with the conflicts presented. Wonderfully raw expression. Thank you for sharing
Thanks so much, VW! I appreciate your kind, emotional comment! This one was a little different for me to write and I wanted to add hope at the end for “her.” This style was also a new approach…if you ever have feedback, I’m open! Thanks again! 🙂
Feedback as in criticism? Good heavens no. I haven’t the faintest idea what I’m doing and I know little if anything about poetry. You are doing quite well for yourself my dear. I look for people, not technique. I know about people; of poetry I know very little. I propose you could teach me more than I could you. You do wonderful work 🙂
Oh, VW, I love how you write! You and I have something in common then, because I’ve had no formal writing training in my fifty years on this planet; I write from the heart and hope my words touch people. I’m open to any feedback, as well…I have learned a lot in simply reading others work; this blogging world of poetry is truly amazing and I’m grateful to be a part of it…thanks so much for your kind words! 🙂
Oh the things we tolerate in the name of hope …..dreams don’t let reality reach us that easy….have seen people tolerating rage and abuse all in hope that one day maybe… or start blaming themselves…
Simply Beautiful ‘L’
Thank you, Soma…I needed to include hope at the end…there are too many women who stay in abusive relationships and need to find the means and resources to find their way out~
Beautiful poem as always! Ty for sharing it with us. God Bless U:)
Thanks so much, PJ! Blessings to you, too! 🙂
You created a ‘sense’ for the poem with starkness of the words, not wrapped in sugar coats, which echoed beautifully the feelings that you conveyed. I found the poem as one of your lines, “Crushing and Bruising the Spirit” until you offered the hope of spirit in the final lines. I was captured to read it until the end. I can’t think of one word to describe your poem, Lauren; it is as good as beautiful, but speaks first of not a beautiful thing. It is powerful and evocative and I felt it in my soul. Thank you for sharing!
Thank you, Angela, for your very thought out feedback, which I really appreciate. I couldn’t finish it on a sad note; there had to be hope in the end and truthfully, I wasn’t sure how this would be received~
I’m completely with you and Vampire Weather as you both commented above. I don’t have a clue about the formal poetry teachings. It’s funny, my poem today is called “A Soul Song Sonnet” because I have only just found out what a sonnet is, tried to write one, but I couldn’t. It just stifled the words in my soul that had to come out the way they ‘are’. I sense this in your words too; little change and crafting, just as they form in the beauty of the soul depths. I too look for people and feeling in poetry. I take my hat off to those who can write beautiful pieces in Sonnets and all the other forms. It takes all sorts to make a world, to find ourselves in it and to love it. 🙂 Keep writing and inspiring… and being you 🙂
Such a sad love story. It raises questions! Why did he hit her so? Why did he? How could he? This is so sad, Lauren, i could cry!
Yes, it is and you ask many great questions that often times stay unanswered…However, there is hope at the end, which I couldn’t leave out…there is always hope, my friend~ Thanks for visiting! 🙂
Sad and moving, very well written.
Thank you, David, I appreciate your positive feedback!
Lauren, very, very moving and sadly beautiful almost to the end, where hope resides in the seeking of light. Truly, truly, forgiving is not equivalent to submitting in darkness. Thank you for such an artistically arranged picture of long-time sadness and pain finally moving into the light!
Thank you, Rose, and I love what you wrote…forgiving is not equivalent to submitting to darkness. I’m glad you found that message in the last verse. Although this is very sad, it is also reality for many women and I wanted to write about it, however, inspiring hope in the end.
Beautiful! I love how you managed to make into a real life story, I could visualize it in front of me!
Thank you so much! I’m glad it was “real” for you; your comment means a lot!
Your own words give the best answer … somewhere back in your comments … “I write from the heart and hope my words touch people” … you do, on both counts!! Never feel like you “have to” write a certain way, or conform to rules or forms. Just be yourself and what YOU need to say will come out. That is what connects with others.
Thank you for your wonderful advice! I appreciate it very much! 🙂
so sad but there’s hope at the end! great work, mom 🙂
Thanks, Steph! I appreciate your comment! xo
What powerful well chosen words. It almost sounds as if you or someone you know has walked along this abusive road. I hope every abused woman will see herself in these words and run like hell!
Thanks, Sandra, but, actually, no, neither I nor anyone close to me has experienced abuse, but hearing about it so much, I wanted to tell a story and inspire at the end of the road…I agree with you and in my heart, I’d like to believe there is a way out in any case, but it’s hard to say without walking in those same shoes or knowing all the facts~
What can I say Lauren… this captured the emotions so well. The plot is intriguing. Such a sad reality for some women but for you, this a fine work of art 🙂
Thank you, BG! We hear of this reality so often that I was inspired to write about it, however, I had to include hope. I couldn’t leave it on a depressing note! 🙂
I didn’t wanna like or comment on this one.. was confused of what I felt.
it is captivating no doubt….
But I’m just glad it ENDS on a positive note.
Thanks, Arch, for your comment anyway! I appreciate how this made you feel. It is very sad, but I couldn’t end it without inspiring hope! I’m glad you liked the ending, too! 🙂
Incredibly honest and captivating. Thank you for sharing
Thank you so much and thank you for visiting!
That is truly amazing as you say you have not personally been in this situation, and I pray you never are. I was trying to explain that no hands or feet are need to used as weapons to grind you down and wipe the floor with you. The tongue and words are the only arsenal needed. The bruises and cuts referred to are in the mind mental cruelty is a mean evil hidden enemy…. Sorry I am off on a rant again. Thank you so much for sharing your wonderful poem! be well and be happy! xx
Thank you and yes, abuse comes in many different packages..I portrayed physical and I really don’t know why, other than from hearing about it and praying for those trapped in the situations…I completely understood your meaning, too, and again, you wrote very beautifully. I think based on your comments, those verbalizing or acting out the abuse are insecure in some way, thus, proving they have some kind of power. I’m no psychologist, but that is my perception, at least. Anyway, thanks for stopping by and I wish you much happiness, too! 🙂
Powerful. Very powerful and beautifully written.
Thank you, Susan, for your kind words and for taking the time to visit~