Where are the Children?

On By Lauren Scott, AuthorIn Discussion, Poetry

I’m feeling a bit nostalgic, reminiscing to when I was a little girl – how I stayed entertained in the sixties. This is when the memory box in my brain comes in handy…

My friends and I used to play school outside on the sidewalk in front of our corner house with three birch trees standing proud on the lush lawn. A big chalkboard took up a fair amount of sidewalk and they elected me to be the teacher. And when school became boring and brains tired out, we’d make a splash in my kidney-shaped pool pretending to be mermaids. How fun it was to dive deep and touch the drain or jump off of the diving board! Then we’d dry off on the grass while playing ‘Operation’ and eating tangerines from our tree. Nothing like trying to manage those surgical tweezers with sticky fingers to avoid the buzz!

When my son and daughter were little, they had a blast playing hide and seek with other kids on our quiet block. They loved riding their cool bikes and scooters. My husband and I also took them roller skating where we all tried our best to ‘roller dance’ to the upbeat tunes. Fun times had by children and parents!

Photo by RDNE Stock project on Pexels.com

Innovation is meant to bring convenience for the human race. I appreciate convenience, but with the good also comes the bad. Unfortunately, there’s an abundance of negative aspects to technology, such as with social media – not only for youth, but also for adults.

So, I miss the old times. When I wanted to talk to loved ones or friends, I picked up the phone and dialed. Remember rotary dialing? Then came push buttons. And what about those cords that coiled up like angry snakes? When cordless phones were invented, they brought freedom. I could walk and talk on the phone without worrying about the annoying cord dictating my whereabouts!

Photo by Nic Wood on Pexels.com

Families gathered at dining tables and chatted about their days, sharing highs and lows. My family participated in this routine every night for dinner when the kids were young. Even as they grew older (when their extra curricular schedules allowed) the tradition continued because Matt and I wanted them to feel like they could talk to us about anything. I’m thankful that communication has never been an issue with the four of us. In fact, many times we’re talking over each other because we all have something to say!

In those simpler times, friends used to hang out, talking and laughing. They didn’t congregate on sofas or around tables with heads down and eyes glued to screens, fingers tapping away. Instagram, Facebook, and TikTok didn’t steal their loyalty. They actually paid attention to each other.

Children’s laughter used to echo down the street, swirling around the trees. Well, that laughter no longer flows in through the windows of my home like a joyful melody.

Where are the children? Are they tucked inside their homes, scrolling on social media? Could be.

This being said, I enjoy the screen as much as anyone. I’m sure you can assume that while I work on this post, a screen stares back at me. However, I think those simpler times were the best of times. Living without the option to blog and form the wonderful connections with you all would be missed, but I could easily live without social media. I’m grateful that my daughter and son didn’t grow up with cell phones until later in high school. Even those were flip phones, offering zero access to the internet. Besides phone calls, good old fashioned letter writing was the glue for staying connected. I still love sending cards and an occasional letter via snail mail.

I can only imagine how difficult it is to find that magical balance of letting your kids enjoy technology in their generation while also maintaining some semblance of control for their safety.

Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com – finding that perfect balance

Do you find technology challenging while raising your children?
Do you remember the old days?
Do you miss them?

Below is a poem from my book, Ever So Gently, which ties into this topic:

Giggles

I can still elicit memories
of when our block teemed
with giggles
echoing in the distance,
the tapping of shoes on asphalt.
Remember hide and seek?
They’d take cover
behind bushes,
parked cars, corner fences.
But where are they now?
Where have all the children gone?
Giggles and footsteps
are silent, and yet,
not one for sale sign
sits in a front yard.
Perhaps, sneaky screens
stole that amusement,
those precious moments
spent outdoors
under the clear sky,
even in rain’s gentlest
sprinkling,
but weather, irrelevant,
the friendships mattered.

© Lauren Scott, Baydreamerwrites.com – All rights reserved.
Cora’s Quest, a children’s book, coming in December!

Thanks for dropping in today!
Hugs,
Lauren ❤️

117 thoughts on “Where are the Children?”

  1. It must be hard for young mothers now as the children want to be connected to their devices all the time. I love to see kids outside having fun, and yes they still do but not as much. What bothers me is seeing the parents on their phones and ignoring the kids. A great poem.

    1. Oh, Annette, you’re right. Every generation of children are introduced to a new form of technology, and the parents are met with new challenges, both social and financial. I’m glad you agree, and thanks for chiming in. xo

  3. A nostalgic and sad (for me) poem. Lauren. I have amazing memories of playing outside with neighborhood kids. During the summers, we were making our own fun outside, all day long. My daughter is probably the age of your kids and she didn’t get a flip phone until high school. She struggles to give my grandson a balanced, active life since all he wants to do is play video games all day. Kids are missing out, I think.

    1. Hi Diana, it sounds like your family is parallel with ours regarding age and flip phones in high school. It is sad when I think about the laughter on our block that doesn’t come anymore. Kids are missing out, like you said, and they’re also getting less exercise from spending more time indoors, along with riding e-bikes. What happened to pedaling and getting exercise while also having fun? Not to mention, the cost of those that might be too much for many families. An extension to the topic, and I could go on, but I’ll stop here. 🙂 Thanks for adding to the discussion. xo

      2. I get it, Diana. It’s too hard to go hiking nowadays. When our kids were young, we were active in Boy and Girl Scouts. Matt and I were both leaders in various capacities, and he lead two 50-mile backpacking trips that our son went on and those are wonderful memories that will live with him forever. Times are different now…maybe try again with your grandson??

  5. Nostalgia indeed Lauren.
    The good old days.
    I fear for kids now, and the stuff that goes on on the net 🙄
    I don’t have any, but imagine it would be a constant worry.
    My favourite game was ring a bell run away 😄
    U also spent most of it outdoors .
    Thank ypu for evoking the memories 🤗
    Hugs and much love 🥰❤️🌹

    1. Hi Maggie, thanks for reading and chiming in! I feel the way you do. There’s so much junk on the web. Sometimes, I’ll google something only to be surprised! 😮Haha, great game, my friend! 😃 We’re not grandparents yet, but if and when that time happens, I’ll be worrying all over again!

      Hugs and lots of love to you! 🤗😎🌻💞

      1. Hi Lauren
        Aww it was a pleasure as always.
        Yes, indeed,the web is a sea of knowledge, with dark undertows🙄
        Yes, but the joy of grandparenting will hopefully outweigh it 🤗
        Hugs and love xoxo
        Many blessings your way.

  6. Totally agree. While the post war period was a time when the average family was struggling with house duties that are cared for with all our household appliances today it was a wonderful time for kids. Government regulations were at a minimum and we were free to get hurt and learn from the experience and a few wacks from dad probably keeping us from developing antisocial habits. We could wander all over the city on our bikes without fear some depraved individual would snatch us for their pleasure. And neighbours actually liked each other and were in each other’s homes at night gathered around the piano or playing cards. Our kids today have everything and because of woke attitudes are unhappy and suicidal. I vote for the good old days.

    1. I understand what you’re saying, Ian. It’s a different time, and now the internet, though it has its benefits, also has its negatives because of people looking to harm or take advantage. I don’t know what it’s like to be a parent of young children in this day and age. I can only imagine how hard it is. So, it feels good to reminisce on those old days. My parents and In-laws used to tell similar stories. Anyway, thanks for sharing your thoughts!

      1. so true! We would play Soft Ball in the street with all the neighbor kids till dark and played a lot of Board Games too. We took our 3 kids camping a lot, they rode bikes, skated & the boys were in Little League. I believe Board Games are making a Come- Back.

  7. Our world has changed so dramatically, Lauren, it’s hard to comprehend how much and what impact it has on us— physically, mentally, socially— almost any yardstick we want to choose. I grew up in the late 40s and early 50s, starting high school in 1957. That’s about the time my parents bought our first television. My passions, for the most part during the summer, were reading and wandering in the woods. There was plenty of play time with my friends, but I was equally happy heading out the door and exploring the surrounding countryside with just my dogs as companions. (Hard to imagine most parents allowing their kids to do that today.) While recognizing the value of cell phones, I find their ubiquitous use obnoxious, whether by adults or kids. There are good things about social media, blogging for example (grin), but it’s meant to be addictive and can swallow people up. That’s bad enough for adults, and can be much worse for kids who miss so much of other things that life has to offer. Balance, I guess, is the answer.

    1. Hi Curt, I found myself nodding while reading your story. Even when our kids were at that age where we could give them just a little bit more freedom, it was a different time and letting go was difficult for the obvious fear of…

      All you said about cell phones, blogging, and social media, I agree with. Social media in any platform can swallow you up, and age does not discriminate. I’m amazed at how much time passes and so swiftly when I’m online, regardless of what platform I’m on. I’ve heard on the news (yes, we believe everything we hear) :), but I do think this is true that social media is causing more harm to kids and provoking mental health issues. Sigh. I’m thinking balance is the answer, but there is so much gray area in this solution. So many variables. Anyway, thanks for sharing your insight and for reading my thoughts today!

      1. Fear has become such a large part of our lives, Lauren. I’m not convinced that things are all so much more scary out there now than we were children. After all, in the 50s they had us crawling under our desks and covering our eyes in case of an atomic bomb going off. I recognize there are legitimate concerns out there, but most of them can be handled with an ounce of good sense. I blame the media for much of the fear and its constant need to deal in gruesome to increase readership and profits. Our daughter said to us the other day, “Mom, Dad, you have to wear your hearing aids. Other wise some one might sneak up behind you and hit you over the head!” Really… I refuse to let fear drive me and I always have. (Although, I confess to waking up a few times in the last few weeks in the middle of the night and worrying about the future of the nation. That guy scares me.) I think if I were raising kids now, I would insist on them spending an hour doing something else for each hour they spend on social media: Playing outside, walking the dog, being involved with sports, reading a good book, doing chores… the list goes on and on.

      2. I get it, Curt. Bad things have happened for years, but we can’t let fear get the best of us. I wasn’t born yet in the fifties (smile), but I understand what your’e saying. There’s a difference between being cautious and paranoid. We just need to discern between both, and sometimes, that’s difficult to do. As to the future of the nation, I (hubby too) feel the same. Scary beyond words! We can barely watch the news, but we also want to stay informed. So you and I have just circled back to ‘finding a balance.’ 🙂 We took our kids camping, hiking, and backpacking, so even as adults, they love spending time outdoors. We did something right! One day at a time. And regarding our kids, someone once told me that the first hundred years are the hardest. 🙂

    1. Thanks for your kind words about my poem, Mary! I miss hearing the chatter and the laughter, which is sad. It’s great that you recently played Operation with your granddaughter! You’re already making wonderful memories that she’ll carry with her as she gets older. I haven’t played it in decades, but I love the memories. We tend to pull out the Scrabble game! 🙂

  9. Where are the children? 🤔 Great reflections Lauren. We lived for playing outside or just being outside period when we were young. What a lovely poem. Oh the good old days. Beautifully crafted my friend. Hugs and smooches! 😁🏃🏼‍♀️🌞

    1. Thanks so much, Kym! Those were the good old days, weren’t they? I worry about the younger generations and how the internet and social media will affect them in years to come. It’s already daunting just hearing things on the news. I’m so thankful my kids are adults. 🙂 Thanks again, and hugs and smooches to you! 😁❤️😎🥰🌻🌅

      1. Oh gosh Lauren, I wholeheartedly agree with you. It is very scary indeed. 😣 Parents have got to step in quickly, because with everything going on, as you noted, it is daunting indeed. Thank you for keeping this matter exposed! 😉🙏🏼😘

  10. Sigh . . . I am overwhelmed with nostalgia for those simpler times. Do you remember Cat Stevens’s poem from 1970, “Where do the Children Play”? It has reached out from the past to walk hand-in-hand with your post.

    1. Oh, wow, Liz, that song goes straight to the heart! It’s so profound, and yet, still relevant in current times. Just reading the lyrics again makes me tearful…

      I know we’ve come a long way
      We’re changing day to day
      But tell me, where do the children play?

      1. I know! If we were asking that question in 1970, where does this leave us now? When I was in my last couple of years teaching adult students, many of them were just tied up in knots worrying about the damage social media was doing to their children and what they could do to help them.

  12. Oh, so many evocative images, Lauren. The phone cords like angry snakes. And “weather irrelevant,
    the friendships mattered.”

    You’re right – the balance with technology is tricky. Thank you for reminding me of the old days!! ❤ ❤ ❤

  13. First, Lauren, I love the poem!

    I never had kids. Early on, life was a boho existence with the arts crowd, rarely any children around. Then there was a hectic career in film, and living on a major urban street where families don’t live.

    I must say it was a lot quieter here before McDonalds moved onto 1 corner, Burrito Boyz on another and a general diner on another. Not that it was ever quiet, but I miss the quieter.

    Still, there are things I miss about the past.

    I miss going to the library. I loved spending hours there, researching. Now, I do most of my research online. I still use the library, but I reserve books online, pick them up and drop them off. The library is more like a book depot now.

    I miss the small art supply shops and book shops that used to be profuse in this area. Now I have to go to chains at the malls for books, and across town in various directions to art supply stores.

    It’s funny you ask where have the children gone? On my many art walks throughout the city, I often pass elementary schools, at recess. I always stop and listen. The energy is staggering.

    There are many philosophical thoughts to be had on the outside of a Frost fence, while children play in the yard within.

    🤍🕊❦🌹🌟💙

    1. Thanks so much, Resa, for your kind words about the poem. I loved reading about your past, and I understand about the library. I used to go all the time before Covid, but now I’m giving too much attention to Amazon (I know your feelings, so don’t be mad LOL), but that’s where I buy other blogging friend’s books.
      We do have a local bookstore that I frequent for other books as well. I love the mom and pop shops. Sadly, there are too many vacant buildings around here.
      The energy is staggering, yes, that’s what I miss on our block from the kids playing outside. The silence is sad. But I appreciate the quiet too in many circumstances. Thanks for sharing your thoughts, my friend. Hugs xoxoxoxoxoxo

      1. Lauren,
        Thank you for your post that made me think…lots!
        Lots of vacant buildings here, too. I do miss mom and pop shops.

        I wish Amazon didn’t have such an almost monopoly on the books/authors world, but it does.
        As I have said before, I boycott Amazon, not authors. This is why I list ALL purchase links after I review a book, including the Amazon link.

        Hey, I thought of you big time on my art walk today. I found a children’s mural.

        It’s based on “Max, and Where the Wild Things Are.” It’s new, and fabulous.

        When is your kids book coming out? Before Christmas?

        Hugs xoxoxoxoxoxoxo

      2. I’m happy to make you think…lots! LOL Ironically, I agree with you about Amazon. It’s just that it’s so convenient and fast. I’m guilty! And what a mural! I’m sure it is fabulous! Are you going to share it? I’ll catch up on your posts too!
        I’m waiting for my print copy of my book to be sure that it looks good. Then I’ll make it public, but yes, the release date will be Dec. 1st if all goes smoothly. My nephew and I had some issues with the cover images, which is why I want to see the print copy first. And I hope you like it. I hope everyone who reads it likes it. It’s simply a story I shared here that went well, so I decided to put it into a book. My nephew was thrilled to illustrate it. But I’m nervous too because I’m not a children’s book author. This book will be my first attempt. It’s like clicking on the publish button of a post with a new poem, hoping for the best. 🙂 Anyhoo, that’s the update! You’re the only one I’ve told this to, so mums the word. 💖😎💖

      3. Okay! I’m mum!

        I will share the mural.I was thinking around Christmas…for kids. Maybe someone has kids or grandkids they could show it to.

        I won’t have read your book by Christmas. If you put it on Kobo, I can buy it there.
        Unfortunately some are leaving Kobo because they can make more $$ selling exclusively on Amazon.
        I was thinking when I do the mural, I could plug your book, at the end.

        I could say something like… Recently released (or about to be released)…from Lauren, completely different from the mural, but for children.
        The cover, book blurb, and links.
        I will be reading it in the New Year!

        Of course I will/want to read it. Hopefully it will be on Kobo.

        If this is something you are interested in, let me know. I can send you some of the images from the mural for you to make a final decision.
        If not, NO worries!

        🤍🕊❦xo

      4. Thanks, Resa! I would love for you to share it! You have me doing a happy dance! 🙂 And I know my other books were on Kobo, so I hope Cora’s Quest will be too. It’ll also be on Barnes & Noble. Would that be a viable alternative to Kobo? My only thought is that if your mural reminds you of Where the Wild Things Are, I don’t think it would pair well with my book. Cora is a fawn who finds herself in a simple predicament that tests her courage. So, let me know your thoughts, and if you could send me some images, that would be great too. I hope they would fit together because that would be awesome. You rock! ❤️🌷😎🤗

      5. Okay!
        So, you are right about a mismatch, but I have another thought.
        I guess it was a Lauren day, because I found an unexpected nature mural… sort of impressionistic. It made me think of you.
        The I found the kids mural “Wild Things”.
        Thought of you more.

        I’ll send you a mail soon, with my new idea. I also found a fawn in my photo files.
        🕊🤍𐂂🌹xo

      6. Sounds good, you know I love nature in all its forms, and it’s nice to be thought of in a positive way. 😄 I really want to send you the cover so you have an idea, but I have to wait to be sure that everything is good. I hope you understand. Hugs 🌷🦌🦌🌻❤️🩷

  14. Those are nostalgic memories I treasure, Lauren. Life has changed and i know my kids feel the difference as do I. Little can be done without our devices anymore and it’s a bittersweet reality. I love the preciousness of my grandchildren, device free! One is adamant about not seeing as much as a t.v. screen, one is “normal” about it and they claim I’m the worst because of our love of blogging. It’s a double edge sword. Love your poem.💓

    1. A bittersweet reality, so true, Cindy! And I can see how it’s a double edge sword. So complicated! But thanks for chiming in as you live in the heart of this conundrum. Good thing your grandchildren are still young, but what will technology be like once they’re old enough? You and I probably don’t want to think about it. 🙂 I’m glad you loved my poem. Thanks so much! xoxoxo

  16. petespringer's avatar petespringerauthor

    I had a very happy childhood. My parents made a rule that we could only watch a half hour of television on weekdays and an hour on weekends. Hence, we spent most of our time outside playing all kinds of games with lots of other kids in the neighborhood.

    I had a selection of games in my elementary classroom that only came out on rainy days when the kids couldn’t go out to recess. Operation was always one of the more popular games.

    Though I’m certainly not anti-technology, in many ways I think it’s harder to be a kid these days with all the bullying that goes on via social media.

    1. I enjoyed reading about your childhood, Pete, and glad you’re another Operation fan! I think most of us are in agreement about technology. I’m not anti either, but we know what it can do for adults. I’m just so thankful that my kids grew up without it until later in high school. And you mention bullying, it’s just another platform for bullies to take advantage. Thanks for chiming in and for also reading my thoughts!

  20. D.L. Finn, Author's avatar D.L. Finn, Author

    Love this picture, Lauren. I feel lucky to have grown up before all the technology I so enjoy now. I loved Operation and that my kids were pretty phone babies. So many good memories with them.

  21. Love your memories Lauren as a kid and as a parent, as a friend. I have mine and I cherish them. Innovation came fast and changed things, changed people and the way we interract with each other. It’s not easy to find the right balance.

    As for kids, I limit screens for my son. I’d rather like to play with him or watch him enjoying inside and outside games alone or with friends. It’s life and it’s so nice to witness this enthusiam and freedom expression!

    Sending you love! And thanks for the sharing!

    1. Thanks so much, Marie. I’m glad you enjoyed reading about my memories and have cherished memories of your own. We did the same thing about screen time when our kids were little, but back then it was watching movies on VHS tapes, which later turned into DVDs. We still have most of them too because of the sentimental value. Sheesh!

      Thanks for sharing too! You’re right, it’s wonderful to witness our children’s enthusiasm when they’re playing, using their imaginations.

      Sending lots of love and hugs, my friend! xoxo

  22. I couldn’t love this any more than I do! You’ve hit so many notes of recognition, Lauren. The project I’m working on is set in the early 70’s (in part) and the reminiscing about play…giggling…hiding…and the rotary phones, long cords…needing to remember friends’ phone numbers. Right there with you. And your poem? Ah. I remember. Yes, I do. 🥰🥰🥰

    1. Thanks, Vicki! I’m always so appreciative of your wonderful comments! And it’s so coincidental that you’re project aligns with my reminiscing to the good old days. I know, remember those long cords? Gosh, it really does seem like yesterday, but it was so long ago. Time is mystifying, isn’t it? Send hugs! xoxo

  24. A thoughtful post. I remember playing board games and with chalk and all kinds of things growing up. And I’m very grateful for that. I think mid-2000’s or so was when the screens really took over because it got so much easier to access the internet.

    1. Thanks, Pooja, and you’re right about the timeline. I’m glad you have good memories without devices. Once in a while, we’ll pull out a board game, but Scrabble tends to be the winner. We play cards now and then too. Even my husband and I don’t always want to be watching TV or spending too much time on the computer. 🙂

      1. That’s really nice, it’s important to continue with those activities instead of just sitting in front of a screen all day. My cousins, sister and I often play card and board games too, for us Monopoly is a favourite.

  25. I love this post, Lauren! When I was a kid, my brother and I were always outside, no matter how hot, riding our bikes, exploring, and playing with other kids. I was so sad when I went to Baskin & Robbins recently and watched every member of a family sitting there on their cell phones, ignoring one another. I mean, what’s the point of spending time together? I took a whole college class on electronic addictions.

    1. Thanks, Dawn! I’m glad you enjoyed this post! I’ve been so nostalgic lately. Maybe it’s because of the holidays right around the corner. Anyway, your point exactly! Families or friends together and yet so far apart as they focus on their phones. I bet that class was interesting! I really fear for the younger generations and the effect social media will have on them.

  26. Thoughtful and thought-provoking post, Lauren. I too often consider the challenges of raising a child in this age, with the prevalence of technology, the intrusion into childhood, it seems. Playing school, roller skating, and playing games like Operation were simpler times that evoked our imagination. ✨

    1. Thanks for reading and for your kind words, Michele. You may agree with me in saying that I’m so thankful my kids are older because of the challenge of raising them with technology nowadays. Social media can be harmful not only to youth, but also to adults. Thanks for chiming in! 🤗💞

  28. Hi Lauren, as I sit here writing this comment, I can hear children playing outside. My own sons used to play outside a lot until they were about 9 or 10. Then computer games slowly crept in but not much before that. I never encouraged TV or movies much we always did things in the sandpit and outside. A lovely poem.

    1. I’m glad my post evoked great memories for you, Robbie. There’s nothing like listening to the laughter of children playing outside. We limited screen time for our kids when they were little. Back then it was VHS tapes and then DVDs, and we still have them for sentimental reasons. 😀 Thanks for adding to the conversation and for your kind words about my poem. 🩷

  32. I love how things use to be. My grandchildren ball have a device in their faces.
    We have custody of 2 of our grandchildren. No devices. We play a lot. We still eat together. Always have. Everyone knows not to bring devices to the dinner table. The kids know when they come over we have lots of arts and craft things to do. And hang out outside.

  33. This is a poignant look back at a simpler time, when, as you say, “Instagram, Facebook, and TikTok didn’t steal their loyalty.” Beautiful poem, and I enjoyed how you provided some backsktory.

  34. A poignant poem, Lauren.

    While I am glad I didn’t have to deal too much with social media with my kids–I’m also happy to have Internet and connections on social media myself. I remember having to print out my dissertation and having to mail my manuscripts to publishers, terrified they would get lost in the mail! I’m always cautious of idealizing past times because they weren’t good for everyone, or they were different, anyway. Lots of people then also did not have family dinners or loving families–or civil rights, vaccines, etc.

  35. No children here, alas, but I certainly identify with much of what you’ve written here. When I was a little kid (before kindergarten), my older sister would force me to play school with her, where she proceeded to teach me to read. I suppose that’s sort of cool–being able to read before kindergarten, but man, I hated school even then! And who can forget Operation? And rotary phones? The farm on which I was raised never even had a phone until I was out of high school (I think the phone lines finally made it to the farm around 1985).

    I must admit that one benefit of being deaf is I don’t own a phone. No land line, no cell, nothing. And I think even if I could hear, I wouldn’t own a phone. I see so many people nowadays addicted to social media, and there’s so much on social media that is incredibly damaging to kids and teens (and everyone, really). You can see it everywhere, at every level of society, and it’s really sort of terrifying. It doesn’t appear as though things will change for the better, either.

    1. Hi Mike, thanks for sharing your story and thoughts, and I’m glad that what I wrote made sense and evoked good memories. Operation was fun, wasn’t it?! 🙂 I also agree with what you said at the end, and I don’t see things getting better. That’s so sad. Anyway, thanks again for adding to the conversation. 🤗

  36. It’s really concerning
    Well, as you said “comes the good, comes the bad”
    Technology has been of a good advantage but has also tore people apart, everyone has now become socially inept

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